Channel Surfing Gifts

"I've been clicking all day and I still can't find the 'confused media buyers' channel!"

'Now I can watch what I want, there's nothing I want to watch.'

'I know you hate commercials, but must you surf for them just so you can mute them?'

"Five million channels! This is heaven indeed!"

"That gives your a certain sense of power, doesn't it Wilton?"

"And now, going for the 'Surfing Through All The Cable Channels In The Shortest Time' record..."

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

'Ralph never switched to digital TV but, since he never stops watching, he hasn't noticed there's nothing on'

Hank had been asleep for hours, but amazingly his clicker finger kept going.

'I tell you, he just sits in back of that thing all day.'

'500 channels...surely there must be something worth watching.'

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

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"Let's see, who do we have to loathe today..."

“You want a football game? I’ll give you a football game. You want a talk show? I’ll give you a talk show. But, for Pete’s sake, let’s not have all that mindless switching around.”

'I've never read any classics, although I have caught snippets of Masterpiece Theater while channel surfing.'

"Stop surfing so fast, you'll fall off the board."

Man holding up a cowboy with his TV remote control.

'I wish you'd hurry and decide which film you're going to sleep through.'

Man with a remote control in a stand-off with a cowboy on TV.

'I can't stand it! Just stop! leave it on one station or turn me off!'

A man is standing up with a remote stuck between his butt cheeks-he says;'Nobody is going anywhere until the t.v. remote is found!'

"There was nothing on so I'm seeing if there's anything off."

'Must...find...something...intelligent..!'

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

"In da house"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

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"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"Just one more site!" "I'm totally, like, in control!" "I can quit anytime I feel like it..."

Check your universal remote control at the door.

TV-Man

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.