Ceremony Preparer T-Shirts

Recorded mating call

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

'I'm the groom's broker and I'll be seating you before the ceremony begins. Technical analysts will be sitting on the left, and fundamental analysts will be on the right.'

The Aisle

'What, They're comfortable.'

Double Wedding

Animals of the Royal Wedding

The Maryland School of Art's Class of 1998 Celebrating This Week's Commencement With The Traditional Thesis Painting Toss.

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

"The couple will now exchange vows they wrote themselves, because I guess mine weren't good enough, but, whatever, let's see what you've got."

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

'They make a deal out of promoting someone around here.'

"Maybe if we hold her under longer."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife. You may assume the position.'

"God it was rough coming into the office this morning after the awards ceremony" "It must have been, you work two doors down"

'We sell gifts for people to give to graduates they know.'

SOARING BILL

Christening

"I couldn't find the giant scissors."

'We'll parachute in and surprise them with their sales award.'

Swearing a Child.

A bit of serious pantomime. - A message from the Lords.

"The bride was radiant, the groom was radiant. I was radiant!"

'Could I borrow your giant scissors for a minute? I cancelled payment on this giant check and I need to cut it up.'

"I do if she does."

'Will you love, honour, and share custody of the remote control so long as you both shall live?'

Snowboy becomes a Snowman.

"I now mispronounce you, Mon and wafe"

'Before you get married tomorrow there are some things your father and I would like to tell you.'