Cerebral Celebrators Gifts

John von Neumann, after completing his book. 'Theory of Self-Replicating Automata'.

"We must rise up and claim our rightful place at the table of society! We must never rest until we are given the respect and dignity we deserve! Chica power!"

Non-Denominational Carols

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

"We fear no more for today is our Independence Day!"

'They call it the people dance.'

"...but this is the stuff of dreams Mr Whitley! Dreams."

Louisiana Mask Mandate

''Et cetera' implies that you know much more than you really do. . .'

Angst - Zeitgeist.

'I see from your resume, that on your last job you were salesperson of the month. Says here that you were given a plague. Do you feel better now?'

Learning.

The wedding.

Tattoo - brain diagram

"I couldn't find the giant scissors."

Before graduating, students at Flegburn High were required to read their diplomas out loud.

"All I know is that some of the best Christmas presents I've ever gotten have come from secular humanists."

St David's Day

Cinco de Mayo notwithstanding, drinking from the toilet was still prohibited in the Ramirez house.

"This is the right side of the brain calling the left side of the brain. Come in, left side..."

'The spare sack? After a million warm beers and pieces of fruit cake...you'd have a spare sack too!'

'I think you'll find that's checkmate for you too, Sir.'

"There are never sleigh tracks on our roof, or soot tracks on our carpet. Maybe you're just fake news?"

In the breakfast foods industry, our award winner, Ernie, is at the tip-top. The honoree is at the vertex, the acme, the apogee ... the summit, the crest, the peak, the zenith! Raise your glasses to the man at the pinnacle! Please don't say it! Thank you for the synonym toast!

"I've been racking my brain for hours and I still can't get today's Sudoku."

"Since I deeply value recognition, I'm honored to present this 'Outstanding Effort' award to what's-his-name here."

Burn's Night.

"Really looks like they could use a miracle about now sir!"

"Assigned to cloud nine! I haven't been there since I caught that twelve pound bass!"

Social Distance Seder

'I seem to recall my pre-school graduation ceremony was called 'so what'.'

Gone But Not Forgotten

Ideas Whose Time Will Never Come.

Professor Yomp gets in over his head at the think tank.

Easter Bunny with a Stick and a Carrot.