Cemetery Wanderers Gifts

Man looking at a mausoleum in a cemetery that has been fitted with a satellite antenna

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

'Ol' Pete was an angler to the end.'

"This could be quite boring. No club jumper, no theme song and no pie nights!"

El Greco

'It says here that later in life they were able to patch things up and became best of friends.'

The last word.

"Eye of newt, not eye of tiger."

"This is one of those beautiful summer days when I'm flooded with memories of things that never happened to me."

'McWit never could build anything level.'

"You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to meet you."

"Just junk mail."

The old woman who lives in a shoe uses a roller skate as an RV.

Too Much SOY

"Mom, Dad – I’d like you to meet Edna."

Respects to Kevin Woodcock.

"Damn! I STILL can't sleep!"

"I feel like we're drifting apart."

Tombstones with convention name tags

Creepy Delivery.

'Say, this isn't so bad.'

Lucky to be born.

"If anyone asks, we never had this conversation."

"He did it my way."

"You're not even listening, are you?!"

"I'm going to put a fir branch on my husband's grave. He always hated fir branches."

"I knew if I started dating again so soon he'd flip out."

"Oh my God, mother! That is, like, so passive-aggressive!"

'We've hit the jackpot, Rusty. This collection must have taken years to build up.'

Oakland cemetery: moved!