Cemetery Wanderer Gifts

Peace, Perfect Peace. There is now!

'He owed a lot of money.'

Tombstones with convention name tags

Divorced: Ex marks the spot

'Did he say anything before he died?' 'Only 'Finger-lickin' good.''

'Ol' Pete was an angler to the end.'

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

Grave: Entered a New Demographic.

"We can learn a lot from cemeteries. In many ways, headstones are excellent records of human society."

'Say, this isn't so bad.'

An old man sees a grave with a 'Your Name Here' inscription.

The Graveyard of Ambition.

Sometimes I wonder what he meant by that. Wish You Were Here, Dear.

Bernie Muscovitz, Whac-A-Mole world champion (former).

"He was always so sweaty."

"You're not even listening, are you?!"

"He did it my way."

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

Poor guy fell asleep with his head in the sap.

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

"I've got you in my sights now, Mister Squirrel, with your fluffy tail and those tiny hands clutching that itty-bitty nut. Aww, you must be hungry...poor little fella... I love you, Mister Squirrel."

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"Have you guys seen my recent collab with the universe?"

Hildegard von Bingen

'I was told this was a big deer crossing.'

"I brought cocoa."

"Listen, pal, I’m not seeing a ‘giant squirrel eating a rib-eye steak.’"

"I got ninety-nine problems, but a birch ain't one!"

Northeastern Deer/Southwestern Deer

Come on Darling: Surely, you don't need a sledgehammer to crack a nut...

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

"OK Dad, I've counted and categorised all the trees in our part of the wood: Now we can start on our sustainability plan..."

"Oh, yeah? Well, you smell nice!"