Cellar Saver Gifts

'How did I fill all this in for only $75.00? Easy, I only collect corked wines.'

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

Toxic chemicals being sprayed onto a beetle that has a map of the world on its wing cases (symbolising the earth and its wildlife)

Murphy's Bed meets Murphy's Law.

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

Murphy bed...Murphy.

"Using a female in hear helps to round up stray dogs!"

One young wife asking another if she finds it more economical to do her own cooking.

Cash Rebate

"Waiter, I'd like to have Black Rhino for dessert!"

"It's about time the price of generic drugs went down! Oh, and give me fifty quick picks."

Tarzan's trees being chopped down.

"Hi, Honey, I went to that new wholesale store...and, boy, did I get a deal on toilet paper!"

World Meat Consumptiom

'You have an impressive cellar.'

'That's one more creature we can remove from the endangered species list.'

You're not selling those silly upside-down tomato contraptions? I confess. They're fun! Fun? They're an affront to mother nature and common sense. A $3 seed packet grows enough for five families. Why sell over-priced fads? Mother nature never offered to pay my rent.

'It's really not that effective, but it's easy to store.'

'Me…me…catch me!'

We may save a lot of patients but we sure kill a lot of trees!

Garden store owner chasing away birds from his seed display.

'Okay if I keep the core? I want to plant the seeds.'

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

'Another dead squirrel, Lieutenant! What kind of Madman are we dealing with?'

'A decade ago, who could have envisioned beds on the wall?'

'hello dear, I just got my new office and i think they're trying to tell me something.'

'It's a small apartment. I'd invite you in, but there's only enough room for me.'

'Solar heat is fine, but I miss our privacy!'

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

"Is it me, or as the rent goes up, does the apartment actually shrink a little?"

'We can't afford a bigger house, and stop referring to your room as your cubicle.'

Then and Now

'I need a bigger office.'