Celebrity Spectator Gifts

James Corden banned from restaurant for abusive behaviour.]

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'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

Bryan Ferry

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

Young boy thinks he's spotted an old rocker.

Tom Hanks

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

'Don't ask questions, Ralph, just tell me who you'd rather look like - Sean Connery or Robert Redford.'

"And Rooney's stretchered off the pitch after managing to stick his foot in his mouth..."

Leo McKern

Harriet Walter

"I'm not an Antony Gormley, I am Antony Gormley."

John Barth wrote "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story." That he did, little buddy. But what if a person spends most of his life watching tv, films, Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, etc? What if my -- I mean, this person's -- life story is watching other people's life stories? Does that make other people the hero of this person's story? Sometimes I don't know where I end and Kanye begins. That'd be somewhere around Kim Kardashian.

'I don't know about you, Clyde, but I'm getting a mighty uneasy feeling we could be riding straight into an ambush interview!'

A convenient attack of swine flu...

Michael Caine

"How is it that Mick Jagger still has the energy to be Mick Jagger, but you're exhausted just from being you?"

Tom Cruise

"I was at a party with SO many famous people, I was the only one there I'd never heard of..!"

David Bowie

CELEBRITY NEWS TEAM"Now here's Frank Sinatra with the weather."

Meryl Streep

Wayne and Kerry created a joint name like their idols Brangelina and Tomkat.

Hollywood or bust!

Viggo Mortensen

"You played yourself in your last picture. Everyone found it unconvincing."

'Man, I'm age 21 now and so far, I haven't done anything important. Things can't go on like this or I will have to forget my plan to become rich and famous by writing my autobiography at age 35!'

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

"Accepting for..."

'Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?'

"Alright be cool. We're just gonna ask for an autograph and be on our way."

Emma Watson