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Dinner in 30 Mins

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

The First Annual Game Show Week.

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

'You say it's a dramedy? We thought it was more of a coma.'

Film Lovers.

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

"The script isn't funny, but maybe if we put some unfunny actors in it and get an unfunny director it will be funny."

Your Leaders Putting Words Into More Words

"Can you take a video of me attacking the garbage so I can post it on Instagram?"

"Aha Mr. Bond - you are in my power!....but instead of just killing you, I'll blether on and on about my plans for world domination so you have time to think of an ingenious way to escape my clutches..."

THE ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI SHOW.

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

"It feels like me against the world but it's actually just the state of Connecticut."

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

Jack Nicholson

"Chills, Randy. I feel chills. And I can't move." "And I can't remember the last time my palms were this sweaty." "This must've been what people felt like when they heard the Allies were finally invading Normandy on D-Day." "No way any movie can live up to this hype." "Wolverine day is almost upon us." "We are about to embark upon the great crusade..."

Brighter days are ahead. I love it when I hear that in both news and weather segments of the program.

"I would never do a nude scene, unless the part really called for it."

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

"And here - take this Vin Diesel monologue with you!"

"Thank you, gentlemen, and may the best networked man win."

Somebody should really be filming this for YouTube.

'What will it be tonight? Gore and dismemberment, idiotic and foul-mouthed comedy aimed at fifteen-year-old boys, a macho revenge fantasy, or our special combo platter?'

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

Note to viewers: we've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

Robert Denarii: 'You talin' to me.'

'Who are you and what do you want?'

'Don't worry Sir, being colour-blind is not much of a problem around here...'

Roger Moore

"You're beating him senseless, but what you really want is his approval."

You talking to me?

Ennio Morricone RIP

Social Media Strategy Session. The more friends and family people see on our site, the personal information they'll post. Familiarity breeds content!