Cautious Calculator T-Shirts

All Eggs in One Basket world headquarters

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

For 29 years, Bert's strategy had been to reach retirement without making any waves,missteps or career-limiting moves. And it might have worked, too, if only he'd foreseen the fossilization risk.

"Do you mind? I'm reading the prospectus carefully before investing."

'I'd like to play, but I'm afraid it might void my warranty.'

"Looks very promising. Put us down for one half of one share."

Them/ Us

"On reflection, it might be prudent to leave this one till last..."

"He wants the cat for his next trick. I'd be real careful about this, Eileen."

'Oh yeah, well your dad may have a better calculator, but my dad can add without one.'

Tortoise Goes For A Swim

"Measure twice. Wipe once."

"Our clients like their accountants to use their 'imagination', but most would still prefer their returns in a spreadsheet."

"Okay, guys. Don't open your chutes till I give the word."

'You have to learn arithmetic in case your computer crashes.'

Half a loaf is better than none..

"Was there ever a boy scout badge for 'caution'?"

'You should try to be more spontaneous.' 'I shall. When I'm good and ready.'

Gymnast on balancing beam about to slip on a banana skin.

'Mom says if you're going to buy anything online,I'm supposed to make sure it's a secure site.'

Don't do it, kid. Think. Think.

"Judging by the belt and suspenders, I sense you're a risk averse investor."

"She wants to make sure we don't lose her money..."

"Happy New Year"

"Just relax. Your investments are so safe you'll be worth a million dollars if you live to be 169."

'I'm a nervous investor so I asked my broker to dilute my market risk. My broker put me into a hedge fund of hedge funds of hedge funds.'

Cancel that turkey and prawn sandwich and make it cheese.

Beware of Everything.

'When it comes to investing, I'm not bullish or bearish... I'm chickenish.'

BOOKS: Stuff you really don't want to know.

My 35 years of experience tell me your tolerance for risk is low...

"I think he's gone a bit OTT with the social distancing!"

"Our low risk portfolio concerns extend to sanding off all the sharp corners."

How To Make Numbers Lie. . .