Cattle Rustler Gifts

"Suddenly, this whole cowboy thing seems like some kind of sad, empty charade."

New Guy.

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Cow Show Tunes

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

Runner going through hurdles.

Glasses on, Crazy Cowman's secret identity was safe

World of Cow.

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

Your Country Needs MOO!

Ranch Dressing

"Oh God, yes! I've been a bad cow! Such a bad, naughty cow! Again! Yes!"

'This is the Polled Texas Longhorn - the breed of the future!'

The first stock exchange - 'It's agreed then, one of my Longhorns for one of your holsteins.'

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

'I told him that's where we keep the keys to his ride.'

'No, I own the cattle. He's the vet!'

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

'Police. We have reason to believe you've been hacking into your neighbor's computers and stealing their recipes.'

"Sounds like a lot of 'EIEIO' to me!"

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

'Now, son - let's review. This is a cow! That was a bull!'

A cowboy on a computer receiving his 'gee gee mail'

"Trust me, Cattle futures are the last place you want to invest"

Super Cow

Erm...what the hell is cud, anyway?

Cow Pop Art,

"First we get a bunch of cows."

"I'm coming - I just need some 'me' time."

'Old Doc gets tired after a hundred head or so, and we try to help him out.'

'It was just a matter of time, old cowpuncher, 'til one of them punched back.'

As Farmer Ron wondered where his cows had gone, somebody started the truck.