Catholic Pillows

'Well, for the sake of argument, just pretend you've done something wicked.'

Father Ted Hughes.

'Is it for your wife or your girl friend?'

'I feel at peace, Father, knowing my enemies & tormentors will burn forever in hell!'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Dance of the Red (Papal) Shoes.

"The whole neighborhood has an opinion on who the next pope should be."

R.C.I.A.

"Last week, the orioles were passing out Baltimore catechisms. This week, it's the cardinals doing baptisms."

Vocation,vocation,vocation.

'...and another thing, Holy Father, do we call them the 'Falklands' or the 'Malvinas'?'

The Pope

John Newman

'Look at all of God's children. Then again, they might be just thousands of tiny, little circles.'

Conclave.

'I really do feel empowered. I should've joined a gang years ago.'

'My God - there's two of 'em!'

'Transistional Pope. Is that nice way of saying they hope he doesn't live too long?'

'Peter, this is Holy Cross School, not Holy Gross!'

Priests Play Good Priest, Bad Priest

Quick Confessional Box - 8 sins or less.

'You think you're pretty humble, don't you?'

Pope Francis

A friar

Inside church reactions to the Pope's resignation...

Pope Francis

At home with the Pope.

Pope Benedict at Easter

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

'Yeah, but I'd like to be led into temptation just once, to see how I'd do.'

God is dead.

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

Some catholic like it hot

"Think about it. Have you ever seen an ugly cardinal—I mean, except at the Vatican?"

Death of the pope.