Catering Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Henderson, Sir - marketing.'

"Oh -- I've got one! If you could have dinner with anyone from history, living or dead, who would you have cater it?"

"And that makes 6! That should be enough to cater for the function tonight. . ."

'I sent out for everything.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

Life is for the birds.

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'A cheeky red?'

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

Domestic Goddess.

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

"You're worried about salmonella? We're vultures for cripes sake!"

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"I specialise in themed dinners 'Titanic', 'Armageddon' , 'Towering Inferno'..."

Party time.

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"