Cat Trainer Gifts

'I tried to organize a stampede, but everybody has their own agenda.'

A cat tamer

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

'Please, Pookie, just one time...pleeaase..Beg!'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Polly txt speak

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"Quick, start the car!"

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

'Bert's dog training.'

"Hey Lady this is a sixty zone!"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

Litter Tray Training

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

'He's not supposed to go out.'

"Look, children are just pathetic substitutes for people who can't have pets."

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

'Listen Sonny, I don't want or NEED to get to the other side!'

"I wasn't howling at the moon. I was singing along to my iPod."

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

"Don't even think about it."

Dog stretching before a walk.

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."