Cat-tastic Storyteller Gifts

Mittens is challenged by the string.

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

Schrodinger's Black Box

Around the Dogbox in 80 Days.

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

Schrödinger and his cat

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

How I met your mother

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."

Pets in Attorney's office - 'The iguana gets everything.'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

Cat Lover's Leap.

Hog Futures

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

Chicken Funeral Planning.

"When I was your age I would have snagged that before it hit the ground."

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

"Come with us to see the wizard. He can find you a brain!"

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

Centaur falls in love.

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

'I want to talk about your efforts to increase sales, Robert.'

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

"It's the dog."

'I've written a poem describing my feelings on discovering the body, Inspector...'

"Relax, it's cat fishing lure. I'm hoping to catch a dogfish."

'Remember the book about the scary monsters, Honey? Well, your father's relatives can't hurt you, either.'