Cat Custodian Pillows

'138 Days without an accident!'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Bathroom Fairy

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

The Cat Spa

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

"Not guilty?"

Whittler's Mother.

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

After bring your cat to work day, I ended up with 5 extra cats.

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

My Bowl Is Empty.

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"I hate all the paperwork there is with this job."

"After being shorted on his bonus, Earl the maintenance man decided to remove all the toilet paper from the executive washrooms."

"It's just me, the algae-eater. Mind if I tidy up a bit in here?"

"And to think NASA hit a target 11 million kilometres away."

"Relax - it's just for a few days until they find a place of their own."

Superintendent

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

'Oh no, green waxy build up.'

'Tootsie-pie is going to be spaded, just like Mother.'

'I had no idea there was a Nobel Prize for school custodian.'

"You may be the CEO, but I control the thermostat in your office."

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

Zen Kitten

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"