Cat Custodian Pillows

'138 Days without an accident!'

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Bathroom Fairy

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

The Cat Spa

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"Not guilty?"

Whittler's Mother.

'I really hate cleaning this thing.'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

Hell No Kitty

"There's no money in your uncle's will. You are, however, directed to maintain his 5 cats and Facebook account."

" ... then subtract 75 pounds for the cat ... "

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

After bring your cat to work day, I ended up with 5 extra cats.

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"I hate all the paperwork there is with this job."

My Bowl Is Empty.

"After being shorted on his bonus, Earl the maintenance man decided to remove all the toilet paper from the executive washrooms."

'Please bow your head and cough. I need to check your hairballs.'

"And to think NASA hit a target 11 million kilometres away."

"It's just me, the algae-eater. Mind if I tidy up a bit in here?"

"Relax - it's just for a few days until they find a place of their own."

Superintendent

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

'I had no idea there was a Nobel Prize for school custodian.'

Zen Kitten

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

Conan the Custodian.

'Oh no, green waxy build up.'