Casual Greeter Pillows

Greetings cards

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

'She'll never look for me here.'

Infinity Tavern

"How are you enjoying the job?" "Oh, Ilove the job...it's the work that I hate."

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

'If you're not doing anything, come on over and we'll shoot the bull!'

PIG OUR Buffet...All you can eat served in a trough!

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

"I've done nothing Instagrammable for months."

Two men jogging past one another trying to get as many words in as possible.

"I've got a very responsible job. If anything goes wrong, I'm responsible."

Please Leave by 9

"I still haven't cleaned up from the party."

'Thanks for the invite: Don't cook anything fancy, I eat pretty much anything...'

'This place looks welcoming enough,Alf!'

Mountain escalator.

"Sir, you said that it's high time to fix the problem, so I rearranged the furniture, watered the flowers and made fresh coffee. If that wasn't enough then maybe we should find some problems that fit our solutions."

Pub Quiz

Man with t-shirt 'I *spade* my dog'.

I know 'enjoy the day' is the latest trendy, trite pleasantry, but in this store, we stick with the classic, 'Have a nice day'.

Recession/Recovery

"Kemo sabe, I want you to be official greeter at my new casino."

'Take it for stress. It helps to laugh at yourself.'

'This wine speaks for itself.' 'Howdy!'

Pizza Party

'Who wants to play celebrity rant?'

Open Mic Nacht

'Was it your idea to have it catered?'

'Yes of course he can borrow my lawn mower just as long as he only uses it in my garden...'