Casual Elegance Connoisseur Gifts

Bill Bailey

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

Preparing for casual dress friday at the investment bank.

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

Workout clothes: 'One size fits none.'

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

"I hope he's wearing pants."

Bats with blankets.

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

I e-bay t-shirt.

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

"If Marcus Aurelius himself were standing here today, I'm sure he would agree this suit reflects perfectly your stoic sensibilities."

"Mixed nuts are brain food, or so I read in 'Mixed Nut Digest'."

'I'm sorry, what were you saying? I was busy critiquing your outfit?'

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

A tailor measuring a jacket.

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'It has a zip-out lining in case of a mild winter.'

'Hoo boy, yes! B-o-o-o-ring!!'

'I know, I left the electric blanket on too long.'

Young man standing with hands in pockets because it is the fashion at his college

All set for the big sleep, Frank? I'm getting there. I've been storing up fat for the winter. And how about Ernie? He's trying something different this year. He's got wi-fi, a game console and virtual reality googles. He's going to cybernate.

''Casual Friday' does not mean you may unbutton your lip!'

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

I rest my case, your honor, in celebration of "Casual Defense Friday." ! !

"We are looking for the non-yucky apparel."

"Psst. . . fancy shoe sales are down. Can you make Crocs instead?"

'I've got a question. If your answer is 'Yes', I'll hate you. If your answer is 'No', I'll hate you, too. The question is, do you think I need a new dress because I'm looking fat in this one?'

'I can't tell you what I spent for reasons of national security.'

"I've always been a gnome body."

Show Mom You Love Her!