Casual Celebrity Seekers T-Shirts

"I never got my name in lights, but once at a game I got my face on the Jumbotron."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

'It's not for myself, you understand."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

'Fancy us all being afraid of wasps when there's a WHOLE nest of 'em in my drinks cabinet!'

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

Leo McKern

Teddy queuing for the Bathroom

'Get me public relations!'

The Acme Agency: "Dedicated to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Media Exposure."

CELEBRITY NEWS TEAM"Now here's Frank Sinatra with the weather."

'She broke up with me because I'm a stray and, thus, always have fleas!'

'Man, I'm age 21 now and so far, I haven't done anything important. Things can't go on like this or I will have to forget my plan to become rich and famous by writing my autobiography at age 35!'

"You played yourself in your last picture. Everyone found it unconvincing."

"I've decided to redefine as a GREAT artist."

As Seen On TV

"Alright be cool. We're just gonna ask for an autograph and be on our way."

'Actually,no. It isn't okay to have a little chat and sign a few autographs!'

Restraining orders from the stars.

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

"Yes, Your Honor, I'm Mr. Brandon, Mr. Shindelbower's attorney, along with his agent and publicist."