Cartoon Comedy Pillows

"He's in an H.M.O. Get some of the King's horses and a few of the King's men."

"I am in so much trouble."

'Ebola is coming!! Ebola is coming!!'

I bark and bark and bark. . . Therefore I am.

'Dave got a bunch of cowboys to install our digital TV. Now all we can receive are old westerns.'

"Any more questions?"

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

"Thanks to coffee I never come down from manic high."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

"Houston, we have a problem."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"They're so adorable at that age!"

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'Whoops! I think you've arrived a little too early for school today, Dad!'

Another All Steel Home Built By Wit Construction.

Plan to Split California into Six States Proposed....

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

Collies Without Borders

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

"Puss in cement boots"

Iran bars two UN nuclear inspectors for 'untruthful reporting'

Emergency Phone.

Barbeque Casualty.

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Actually, a broken arm is not such a big handicap for me...'

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'