Cartoon Appreciation Club Pillows

"I hope he's wearing pants."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

'No Renee, not until you get two degrees, pass a rigorous physical, and beat out thousands of other qualified individuals.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

Skeleton playing fetch.

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Early photobombing

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

Cat chases mouse across a Zeppelin.

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"Congratulations. It's a chick."

'okay...where did you hide it?'

"Cat World Domination Day June 24th"

"Recalculating route..."

'Yeah, I'm sorry to break it to you bud, that eating grass thing is a myth!'

'It's true what they say, you really can hear the sea in these things!'

"Move ten paces, turn, then fire. Ready?" "Dibs on the hat."