Carnivorous Plants Gifts

"Larry, did you water the plant?"

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"Rats, I thought he'd like my science project!"

A butcher and his apprentice.

'White meat or dark?'

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

Blatant competition in nature.

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

The Butcher of 35th street.

"So who gets the rib eye and who gets the salad?"

It's an unwritten law. Guys can like only two kinds of flowering plants - a cactus with thorns or that one that eats flies.

Venus Fly Trap

"You know, lentils have twice as much protein per serving."

'Oh man, these are way better than flies!'

'Not at all, Mr. Porker, we already have several pigs working in our company cafeteria.'

"Sorry sir, it appears that we're out of chicken fingers."

'We are out of flies at the moment. Permit me to recommend the lunch meat served on a toothpick.'

We'll have whatever they are

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

"Sure, dead meat is good...it's just that sometimes I'd like a nice salad or a fruit cup!"

The good and bad news for the species is we have less fat than beef.

'First, wool. Then, lamb chops, Now they've got us creating antibiotics for them.'

Fact: Carnivorous Plants use Smell to Attract their Food

'We lit the fire and we're cooking the meat.' 'Hey - easy with the technobabble.'

Venus Fly Trap

'She works with carnivorous plants.'

'How come your venus fly trap isn't catching those flies?'

"I refuse to eat vegan food. I'm an omnivore, me!"

"I'm one of those vegetarians who eat meat."

'Did you spot the Venus Flytrap, Henry?'

'We do not discuss soybeans on these premises, Mrs. Grommet.'

Ill Advised Vegan Survey