Carefree Child Gifts

"Somehow I just can't get worked up worrying if Social Security will be there when we need it."

"Think of it as a big puddle."

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

Swinging

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"...then finally, I got serious and started a band."

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

Is your glass half full or half empty? Who cares, fill her up!

'Wow! School's only been out for ten minutes, and I've already forgotten everything I learned.'

'You have failed on all counts...'

Running

"Yes sir, I'm late. But I thought we were supposed to stop and smell the roses ... "

'Just look at him- a fool and his money are soon partying!'

'Just think...summer's coming, and everyday will be like Saturday morning!'

"Should be back soon. He's just out catching a few x-rays."

"That's the deep end."

Whatever!

"So you dreamed you were an adult?"

'I was cleaning my catapult and it went off.'

"This is where I come to unwind."

Mexican Dog

"They grow up so slow."

"Ain't worth the whiskey!"

'Dude, I got the rest of the day off, so I'll be able to go riding after all!'

Weathervanes.

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

"You and your lists! You're missing out on life."

'My socks don't match, but neither me nor my socks care.'

"My summer vacation report contains descriptions of excessive sugar consumption, and unsupervised play. Listener discretion is advised."

'Now this how you handle the end of summer...'

'Tell the doctor that I'm too sick to see him.'

"Ya know, no mask or hand sanitizer can spare you from spring fever."