Career Worrier Pillows

'Of course things change: our fathers were replaced by machines - we'll be replaced with new software.'

"I hate my job and I'm terrified of losing it."

"Actually, I'm hoping what I'm going to be when I grow up hasn't been invented yet."

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

Caged Businessman

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

'Being a nobody isn't so bad...You don't have to worry about becoming a has-been.'

'But do you realize what this report cart will do to my self-esteem?'

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

'How long's he been out there?'

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

"Night of the living adjunct professor" "What's a sabbatical?" "Tenure is boring!" "I have four desks in four schools!" "I have more prestige than a grad student."

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

'This is where the company started handing out sick bags!'

Nervous Kid sees the dentist's toolkit.

Still Here

Don't jump! Just think what it will do to your wife and kids not to mention your career as a motivational speaker!

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

"I'm at the point where I find mixed signals reassuring."

"The boss complimented Bob today... but now he's afraid if he talks to him again he'll say something stupid and ruin it!"

"I refuse to go down with the ship."

Energy Bills

"No, there's nothing wrong at my job. That's what's got me worried."

'So do I get the job or not?'

"You know it almost BEGGARS belief that so many people are unwilling to pay for professional pension advice."

"I don't know what we'll do when our adjustable-rate mortgage resets."

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

'It's money in the bank. . . so it's worrisome.'

'Well, we've been talking about downsizing, and it looks like the bank is going to make sure we do.'

"Sidney gets nervous if he's too far from his money."

"I'm at that sweet spot in my career...right between 'young and underpaid' and 'old and too expensive.'"

"My take home pay must have gone to someone else's house."

"If we are to save the firm from collapse then we need leadership...perhaps we should start by convening a group to have a little think about the colour of the files we'll be using?"