Career Whirlwind Navigators T-Shirts

"A signing bonus, a raise, a promotion, a layoff -- you've had an entire career in six months."

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

"And finally, I’d like to thank all those people I stepped on and used to get here. I couldn’t have done it without your submissive insecurity and relentless resignation."

Between Offices

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

"Why do you always assume I'm going down?"

A cartoonist at the doctor, in yoga, at home and in therapy

"I'm good at ticking boxes."

'I never wanted the best years of your life Clayton - just a few good days would do.'

'I was speeding right along toward my goal of moving up from middle management, when a cost-cutting measure overtook me!'

"Trust me, you don't want this job."

'Looks like this part of the beach has been claimed.'

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

"You're 30 now. Where do you see yourself in five years?" "Thirty five."

Doubt or Certainy

"I owe my success to always being the lesser of two evils."

"Where would you say you are on the confidence/cockiness spectrum?"

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"Intern? Oh, no. He wandered in from our day care center."

'I received matching offers.'

"It all happened so fast. I met him online three years ago."

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

"I think we might already have lost the next set of graduates, they don't see us offering a career path..."

"I see myself rising through the ranks of the organization until midlife, when I will most likely hit a wall and go screaming through the door."

Even pirates have kids. 'Look, mom...no hands!'

"I've seen a number of meteoric career flameouts in my time, but Phil's was sure in a class by itself!"

How to Polish Up Your Resume. Remember, you don't want to polish it to the point you can actually see yourself in it.

'Your career is a change management textbook.'

'Why did you leave your last job?' 'You would too, if they sold your desk and changed all the locks!'

I hate these flying fish

'Typical male: Too proud to ask for directions or take advice! Look at us now!'

"Don't just sit there. Build a boat!"

Universidad