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Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

Go! Means NOW!

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

Teamwork!

'Congratulations on breaking through the glass ceiling of the company downstairs. However, I will be sending you a repair bill.'

Upward Progress

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

"Well, I'm sad for Gloria...she's gonna be bummed out when I'm twice as successful as she is."

'I try not to think big too often or I get terrible headaches.'

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

'If I may say so, business is booming.'

Win - win

The rope to success.

'That's the first cubicle I ever worked in.'

Gloat

"I didn't really start applying myself seriously until around the eighth life."

If a moo can rise to the top, so can I.

"I've finally arrived. The C.E.O. stopped saying 'who the hell are you' whenever he sees me."

"I think I gained weight because of the heavy reading Mr. Klacken assigns us."

"Ok, so you got the worm. What are you going to do with the rest of your day?"

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

"We've come so far together...wouldn't it be great if they had frequent achiever miles?"

'I became successful when my dreams changed from the Cary Grants of the world to federal grants.'

Ladder of Success.

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

"What made you start blogging about success?"

First Prize!

'They're a very successful family.'

Day one, post grad

"The labor market is awaiting you!"