Care Duo Appreciator Pillows

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

Look on the bright side...they'll probably name a disease after you.

'I married him because he made my feet tingle when we played footsie. Turns out it was neuopothy.'

'We were made for each other.'

"Mom, this is Sarah, the friend I was telling you about."

"So. Mr Smith, what makes you think you are too controlling?"

Caption Contest TK

CFL bulb and ice cream cone fall in love

North Pole.

Thomas was brought up by his extended family

Aethel the Analyzed.

Coronavirus

Thank You to Vaccinators

"I'm Roberto, and I'll be your waiter this evening. This is Carl. He's in charge of portion control."

'When I married him, I didn't expect the full frontal crudity!'

"Welcome to Mom's place. I'll be your waitress, dishwasher, and cook tonight..."

Gay couple living together.

"You're a cow ... not a burgermeister."

How To Be Your Own Best Friend

"I can see it from here."

'Watch your step. I happen to know you're an alpha male.'

"We go together like bacon and eggs."

"Stop tensing your abdominals!"

'The opinions expressed by Mrs Latimore are her own, and do not necessarily reflect those of Mr Latimore.'

Herbert can't read, Janice can't jump, but together they can rule the world!

'A babe magnet? Shouldn't that be a fridge magnet?!'

'Last year I went to a chocoholics anonymous meeting twice...once to join and once to renew.'

"They have this arrangement. He earns the money and she takes care of the house."

'Try not to take offense when he says - 'Of all the hip joints in all the world etc etc.''

"Weird, isn't it? This feels real, and my life before seems like the masquerade!"