Card Trickster Pillows

Hit me.

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

"I just found out that, at this firm, I'm the queen of hearts."

"All those close-up magic classes don't seem so 'worthless' on day 190 of quarantine, do they."

"Hey, Dad, you were wrong. I've counted them all and gran is playing with a full deck of cards!"

"Now don't let your concentration move from my hands and the cards. . ."

'No, I mean you really are playing with less than a full deck.'

Magician playing cards with rabbit

'Your eyes are playing tricks on you.'

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

'Your shoe's untied.'

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

Primitive magician

Some card-game puns

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

Candid Camera store.

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'Of course he can do tricks...it's just he's got a bad memory.'

Yoyo sheep

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Magic Tricks

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

"Trust me. Don't do it."

Magic Tricks

Magicians hat being pulled out of a rabbit

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

A dog has inflated the family cats with helium and they are floating on the roof.

"Police, this is the wife of Magi the magician, something's happened to him!"

"If you dress in a costume that they can't figure out, they feel guilty and give you more candy."

He'd attended Julliard and done Shakespeare in the park, and he never thought he'd sink this low, but there were bills to pay, and there weren't that many jobs out there for a bottle of seltzer water.'