Carbon Footprint Conscious Gifts

'How much of the environment are you willing to destroy?'

"If oceans are absorbing more carbon dioxide, why isn't this water fizzy?"

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

Bee flying to another flower.

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

"What's your favorite planet, Randy?" "There is only one answer, little buddy. There is only one planet full of lush, green forests and beautiful, windswept ocean vista... all of which are natural aphrodisiacs that inspire lovers, philosophers and poets." "You know, Pandora is not a real planet." "I'm talking about Earth, you... Do you ever go outside?"

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

REPENT! Get back to nature

The economy and the environment.

Electric car

"Please buddy, can you spare a carbon credit?"

The big pause

"It seems even the local council are aware of your drink problem."

"Scientists don't know anything. . . but we need to leave this to those more qualified. . . like scientists!"

Man rolling the world across a shaky bridge between organic food and genetic food.

"hmm. Mother Nature's definitely trying to tell us something here."

No one drinks from fountains anymore. Thanks to bottled water, they've been replaced. By bottled water fountains.

Methane Emissions

'I wonder if everyone else is making as much effort as us to reduce global warming.'

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

Each of you attending this climate conference will receive a copy of my 9,000-page study on how e-mail has saved millions of trees.

'The automatic doors won't open.' 'Your carbon footprints are too light.'

Desk of an urban farm manager

"If I give up drinking...will you give up global warming?"

Voting is about to start and they're campaigning furiously down there. The DNA is discussing policy in depth. DNA has detailed plans. The carbon dioxide is complaining about the negative press coverage its getting, and the chlorophyll is pushing a green agenda. The individual atom candidates are receiving lots of attention --- their truthfulness is being questioned. Voters must have heard that "atoms make up everything"!

I keep taking him back because I'm a big believer in recycling

Tree funeral.

Turning the switch on the environment.

Food Pyramid.

'Surely the most environment-friendly holiday is staying at home.'

'We have a new line of eco-friendly shoes. They're designed to reduce your global footprint!'

The oil crisis.

Guzzle-guzzle-guzzle