Carbon Connoisseur Pillows

'Oh no! I've had tons wiped off my footprint.'

The three bears complaining about their carbon.

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

A Sticky Buns Bakery is positioned next to a gym.

The Alpha Seltzer

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

Dog Walker

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

Shaved Ice

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Moliere

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

Charles Dickens.

Bleak House

'Bit of an over reaction to a world-wide shortage of bismuth, don't you think?'

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

Complex Carbs

"It needs a dash of gravel, I reckon."

"Don't forget, the market will take a sharp downturn on the stroke of midnight."

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

'Your business plan needs work, I'm not feeling a tingle of moral remorse.'

"Hold on there buddy, that's not a KJV Bible." (two men talking, one with a Bible)

'Must...find...something...intelligent..!'

When feud becomes best seller! Moby Dick vs Herman Melville!

Sergei Rachmaninov

"Don't worry, she's still alcohol aware."

"I'm in a love-hate relationship with money. I love it and I hate not having it."

"I thought you were trying to go carb-free?"

It's Tinned !

'Sometimes I worry that maybe money can't buy happiness, but then I return to reality and I'm O.K.'

Bad Carbs