Car Fitter Gifts

'You're brakes are still a tad spongy, so I've made your horn louder.'

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

Organic Soldering.

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

Turmoil change.

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

Animals are smarter than we think!

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

A souped up car...

"If they can rig emissions tests, why can't they fake crash tests too?"

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

"She does this when she's tired."

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

Chair - Ready for Self Assembly.

'Yes, you were abandoned. But then I adopted you. Why are you still taking it out on my couch?'

DIY.

"See that dog, Mr. Hendricks? That means you either have a shredded fan belt or your fuel pump is sucking air."

Super glue . . .

"Turn down the bass."

"Don't worry Doctor. We expect your car to make a full recovery."

A man drives a car with the word "LAWYER" painted backwards on the front hood so that it can be read in the rear-view mirrors of other cars.

Woman finds sensitive mechanic to date.

Car robbers foiled by mousetraps surrounding a car.

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

'Sorry, I'm afraid it was a false alarm. It turns out that 'the emergency gas leak' was my husband.'

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

Irritable dowel syndrome

'I understand you work on foreign models?'