Car Cleaning Warrior Pillows

'Wait till she's dried it off completely -- it'll stick better that way.'

The household cavalry

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

Car wash / Mouth wash

"Actually he only asked for a buff-up."

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

'It doesn't look good, sir - the enemy is amassing vacuum cleaners along our southern border.'

'Why is it I can see what needs doing around here and you can't? . . . I know what cures that. . . 'Chores-ercise'.'

4 Great Life Hacks for the Holidays!

Human Dust Buster

'Even if I did know what SEO was - what's wrong with washing cars for a bit of extra pocket money.'

'Our dog needs a bath too.'

'Don't blame me, I told you to pick your feet up.'

"Remember when all this was free?"

Eco-friendly car wash.

"I did take off my muddy shoes, mom...these are my socks!"

'Why do you keep watering it, Dad? - It's not going to grow larger!'

'Remember, the best time to walk on it is just after they've washed it.'

"First."

"I said, I think it's time we changed the cat's litter box!"

Hand Car Wash.

"My kitchen is a magical place. People suddenly appear at mealtime and disappear when it's time to clean."

'I'm so embarrassed driving such a filthy vehicle...'

"Gloves off at the table please!" "They're not gloves, they're dirt!"

"I can skip my bath tonight. I put the windows down when Dad drove through the carwash."

"Myron's doing one of his side jobs again."

"I told you! Seeing your reflection on a recently washed and polished car's roof is the best remedy for constipation."

'Mum said you were the first man she ever trained, Dad.'

"With the deluxe package you get a vacuum, vanilla scented interior spray freshener, carnauba wax, and enlightenment."

"Washing the car?"

"Does he like those shorts you bought him for Christmas?"

'Hurry-up... I'm waiting!'

'Muffy!'