Captain-in-training Gifts

My First Boat

Football Fans

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Captain in a storm

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

Super Student

Welsh airport arrivals.

'When will I be old enough to have my own people?'

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

'Just in case there is an accident.'

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'What a bunch of control freaks!'

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

Verbal Orders

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

Martin Luther King and Obama.

'I've got a cape. I think I can make it.'

What really happened on the EVER GIVEN

Solemn Reference is Made to Mr Bunsby

"Get those decks cleaned you swabs!..."

The crew can no longer tolerate Captain Bligh's ruthless splitting of infinitives."

"This is their way of reminding us how we're losing our best hope for Olympic Gold."

'I told you we should have unionized.'

'Well, we still think you're a naughty boy, running away to sea like that!'

'So it's true that dolphins help navigate.'