Canine Scientist T-Shirts

The Art and Science of Car Chasing

Bears catching fish

A day at the transgenic races

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

The Z Chromosome: Zebratic engineering with questionable results.

"That, believe it or not, is also a mammal."

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

Protoplasm

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

'Do you mind if I take a few pictures, Bill?

'Get me everything you have on bunny rabbits.'

Dog History

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'I can't come out to play, I have to help my owner work on his bike. Sometimes it sucks being a smart breed.'

"Okay, we get it. You're descended from wolves."

'Don't worry Darling, they're scientists'

"I don't think this is what is meant by Animal Science, but it does take it to a new level!"

Dolly, Twenty Years Later

"I'm about ready to forgive the French."

"No, no, that's my copy of 'Being and Time'—look at the teeth marks along 'Heidegger'."

Ophiologist

"I've lived among them my entire life, and I can tell you, 'fetch,' 'roll over,' 'sit,' 'stay,' and 'bad dog,' is the extent of their vocabulary."

"Obviously somebody contaminated the sample, Kevin."

'No, its not low on toner, Dr Higgins. Just admit you don't know how to clone sheep.'

"Is that Penny I smell? It's been so long... Hold on, is this Dougie? No way! That crazy mongrel, he is nuts! I remember that time he chased those kids on skateboards all the way down Cliff Street. Wait, is this Rosie?!"

"I read somewhere that he thinks we're very large, very odd dogs."

'I think the experiment is over Hargreaves, I've noticed that they've begun to use them as currency.'

'I realize how difficult it is to accommodate oneself to small animal practice after 30 years of livestock...

"Why don't they come up with a breed that'll live longer?"

Doggy Peer Pressure

"I started out by learning a few counting tricks, then loved it so much I now have a PhD in theoretical mathematics..."

'Fidelity is overrated.'