Canine Economist Pillows

'Where I come from it's called collateral.'

Dog makes a bank deposit.

"My owner's been teaching me how to beg. . . I've made £30 today!"

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"What these product ideas lack is a little bite."

"Yes, the market did advance this week, Rebecca, but we feel it's somewhat of a 'dead-cat bounce.'"

'Oh my God, dog biscuits are down!'

"No, no, that's my copy of 'Being and Time'—look at the teeth marks along 'Heidegger'."

Investments: Still Open to New Investors - 'A fool & his money fund.'

'What, you again? And you'll want credit as usual, I suppose!'

'They're not our 'profits,' Mike. We like to think of them as the organic by-products of non-toxic capitalism!'

Dog Training For The Ninties

"Good boy."

I finally turned lead into gold, and now my financial advisor tells me he's turned it all back into lead?

'The dollar fell against all major currencies this morning, and then, while getting up, bumped its head, REALLY HARD, on some sort of coffee table. I'm afraid that's all we have right now. Stay tuned for further updates.'

'Stocks rose on news of a proposal to have greed' dropped from the seven cardinal sins.'

"Sorry about that. He doesn't like bikes."

'...Now just key in your safety pin number...'

'My dog is worried about the economy because dog food is up to 50p a can... that's about £3.50 in dog money!'

'The dollar and I seem to be weakening at the same rate!'

Santander Bank pays out cash by mistake on Christmas Day

'...anything else, sir?'

First savings & bone.

'I actually make a lot more money as a bookmaker than I ever did as a race horse...'

'There are change vibrations that only he can hear.'

"Do you take Diners Club?"

'Do you have a dog biscuit ETF, chew toy ETF, rawhide bone eTF. . .?'

Dog has a hi-yeild inbox full of bones.

'In the ebb and flow of today's economy, are we ebbing or flowing?'

100 Days Without Allowance Raise