Campfire Starter Gifts

'This match won't light.'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Desert Island BBQ

Harsh Mellows.

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"Can we set the flame to a medium high?"

Roasting the Moneybox

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

Pan Extension Chord

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

"Okay lets go. You can message your friends after dinner."

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

"Your wheel idea was a huge hit, so what have you got for me this time?"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

Good luck with that quest for fire thing! I'm just going over there to eat some grass!

Flash Cuisine

'I was just rubbing sticks together for fun -- I didn't realize I was doing basic research.'

'I was just rubbing sticks together for fun -- I didn't realize I was doing basic research.'

Nobody likes a smore loser

"Let's just binge watch this."

'An no one heard him scream when they screwed on the pump and slowly drained all his vital fluids...'

Creepy Camp Stories.

"and when they woke up, the kids discovered that the house had just one 19", black & white TV that only got... 3 channels."

"He must be a pro. He's got his own stick."