Calm Communicator T-Shirts

'The therapy is working... I don't use all caps in emails anymore.'

"Remember, Mort: Courage isn't the absence of fear. Courage is remaining media-savvy in the face of fear!"

"Darn it, she's unreachable when she gets her inbox down to zero."

"No matter how dire the problem...no more memos that start with 'YIKES!'"

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

"Don't even think about it."

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

"Hire me and I'll bring in orders. Big orders. You're gonna need a bigger door."

Woman followed by devices.

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

'I can remember when no one had even heard of t'ai chi.'

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

Mime marriage.

"Don't judge me until you've walked a mile on my medication."

"We'll less than two metres again, don't know where, don't know when..."

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

"I pick up on people's pain, Alexander. What's wrong?"

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

Yogi back in 5.

Relax.

You May Bang Your Head Here/You May Talk To Here.

'Oh sure, Your Honor, he can speak. He's using sign language ...

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

"Your free-floating anxiety is floating over to me."

"I am staying ‘present,’ and presently she’s annoying me!"

"I've found my voice, Penny. It's deep, wise, and compassionate."

'Taking the anger management class has made you uncharacteristically nice, sir.'

'Why are you being so passive aggressive?'

'Yes, I agree. But what really caught my attention is what the boss ISN'T saying!'

'Remember, son. A winner is one who can keep his head while all around him are losing theirs.'

"I can't wait 'til we're so close we don't have to talk."

"Don't yell in the restaurant. Use your texting voice."