Call Screeners Gifts

"Another bloody cold caller asking if I want to lead the labour party!"

I'm away from my desk. Any message you leave won't be of any importance to me.

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

'Shhh... It's babies app time.'

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

Men's Health Screenings.

"I'm so overloaded with emails, just one monitor wasn't enough to handle them all."

'They might as well sleep all day - all they do is stare at that screen.'

Drama Llama

"Wi-fi....Wi-fi...WI....FI!...."

"I'm just sitting here collecting vast amounts of metadata. And what are you up to?...Oh, I already know."

Caveman at Computer

Ball and Chain

'The pain in your eyes is from too much TV. The pain in your arm is from too much base-ball and that other pain is from too much home-work.'

"This is going a lot smoother than we anticipated."

"There must be an app for this..."

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

Coffee then and coffee now.

"If I've got no messages how do I know I even EXIST!"

No calls, I'm resting on my laurels.

The TV asks a man on a computer: 'Don't you love ME anymore?'

"What? I AM taking a break from the computer."

"Ten more minutes of media manipulation, then it's off to bed."

Cellphone Heads

'Fred can monitor financial markets around the world 247

'I'm worried about him always on that phone and not playing outside enough.'

Screen Addict

Deadly Radon

The village cinema-club was going down a treat with the locals!

"Don't you think we should do like the opthalmologist asked,and move him back from the television set?"

"I like having a laptop with a big screen, but my back doesn't."

The modern family drifting apart...