Calculator Repair Specialist Gifts

'Forty two carry four...' - 'Please get your calculator fixed.'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

"It's running five minutes fast."

'Division is just like addition except you have to use a different button on the calculator.'

'I forgave ya for puttin' 'em all in one basket, but this goes too far!'

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."

'According to my calculations, George, you don't exist. You... don't... exist, George. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.'

He'll be fine after you reboot him, I've replaced his memory stick.

"You're late."

Our Computer is Up/Down.

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

'Well, arithmetic IS important. It let's you understand money so you can buy batteries for your calculator.'

Here's your problem. You have an iPod.

"I'm leaving you. I would have told you earlier but the time just never seemed right."

"These aren't barnacles. Someone stuck their gum down here."

'Funny, it usually works OK after you've given it a hefty kick.'

"We can have your drone here fixed in a day or. . . if it sits still."

'I think I've found what's causing your funny buzzing sound.'

'Oh yeah, well your dad may have a better calculator, but my dad can add without one.'

'There must be some mistake. According to our actuary tables I'm going to live to 83.'

'Ma'am, I think I already see the problem with your cuckoo clock.'

'Odd as it may seem, it needs oil.'

For the last time, I know the basement is wet….

"It looks like I'll be able to recover you 2014-15 accounts but I'm afraid your 'Naught and Nice' files are toast..."

Accountant job

'Your computer picked up viruses. . . An ounce of perversion costs a lot of pounds to cure.'

'Well, I've managed to get rid of the annoying double vision effect on your T.V.'

"I was watching it as I was eating my breakfast cereal, and it just went; Snap, crackle and pop!"

"I was told I needed to clean out my computer, so that's what I did. Maybe I used the wrong detergent in the washer, because it won't work now."

"It doesn't go 'baaroom' anymore. It only goes 'beep.'"

The Office Dinosaur in: Mr. Fix-it

'I think that's right, but let me check.'