Buzzword Collectors Gifts

"If it made sense, that would be a very powerful idea."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

"Repeat after me: We are delivering the proactive core value promises and rolling out our real time best practice action plan going forward ..."

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

Final words on gravestones.

What Business People often say (and what they really mean)

Bee to bee: 'We used buzzwords before they were trendy.'

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Strategic Planning Magnetic Kit showing words such as 'increase,' 'global,' 'leading,' and 'profitable'

"Which 'ism' am I this week, Ms. Trotter?"

"Let me through, please. I know what the letters C.P.R. stand for."

"Can you go through all the old pitch decks and replace the word 'crypto' with 'AI'?"

"O.K. What part of 'malignant regression and pathogenic reintrojection as a defense against psychic decompensation' don't you understand?"

'It has everything... I love it!'

'Sir, what comes first ??" the buzz or the spin?'

"Our brand is about talking about our brand."

Communicating with clients without using buzzwords posed a challenge for the consultants.

I called you to this synergistic ideation to strategize methods of creating new annoying words.

'I'll give you this, Hargrove - Your report was a perfect blend of cliches, banalities and platitudes.'

'I have no idea what a Wiki is but I want one on my desk next week, now move it, people!'

"I work in PR where I provide a dynamic and highly effective bespoke service that can work for you and blah blah blah ..."

"Excellent report! Totally incomprehensible and confusing! Not one of our board members will understand a word! Absolutely perfect!"

They had no idea what they were doing, but it didn't matter...

Gads. I've forgotten today's buzzword.

'I'd like to push the envelope, go the extra mile, and think outside the box to facilitate a win-win solution to the over-utilization of buzzwords.'

'Do you get the feeling that, in educational workshops, there are way too many buzzwords thrown around?'

''Big Society'...paradigm shift blah! Blah! Community spirit, neighbourhood cohesion, blah! Blah! Social inputs, perceptual platforms blah! Blah!'

'Warspeak department' making up new military terminology.