Business Strategies Gifts

We found 'im!

'When I talked about, 'fundamental changes to chore practices to align ourselves with a changing business environment', I was referring to more than you moving your desk closer to the window.'

'Now that we all agree on the agenda, a show of hands on how many want to keep it hidden.'

Successful business man

"Let me know when you get tired of berries. We'll work on your people skills."

'Honesty is the best policy, but the Dishonesty policy has lower premiums.'

'Any wriggle room?'

"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."

"We saved a lot of money by investing in older computers. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go figure out why our profits are down."

Global Economy.

'You're supposed to dodge the bullet points.'

'Your ambiguities are impeccable, young man - just what our department needs.'

'Uh, Frank, this concept just isn't working for us.'

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

Pharmaceutical sales rep Jules Halm loved to sport his 'jacket of 1,000 pills.'

'Interesting business plan.'

'If your guru business is slow, do what I did. Get a professional website presence on the Internet. That's how you found me, right?'

"If the new marketing campaign, the new business concept and the new sales strategy doesn't work we still have plan B: We sacrifice a goat."

"He usually doesn't see anybody without an appointment, but since you brought pizza ..."

Scapegoat: In case of emergency

"The big money is in development? Now you tell me?"

'Jones, somewhere out there, we've lost our common sense. I want you to go and bring it back.'

'In a complex court settlement, our parent company gets custody of us on the weekends.'

"My secretary will take charge of removing chairs, and eventually there will be just one of you left..."

Medical and Window Treatments

'Don't think of it as transferring departments, think of it as a fresh opportunity to become somebody else's problem.'

"You don't frighten me, T.J."

"This is Plan A. I recommend we skip it and get right on to Plan B."

Business Target

"I don't think it's by chance that I keep getting the low chair."

"I bought this franchise. It came with a cup, a marker and some cardboard."

"Sometimes it's just good to sit back and get a different perspective."

'The details of the company's new management plan are being worked out.'

"Yes, I did say we needed to do more mobile marketing. But, putting a sign on your car isn't what I had in mind."

"Wow, that's . . . profound."