Business Strategists Gifts

'I'm a bit pressed for time. Give me your one-minute elevator pitch.'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

'All those who think change is good, say aye...'

"Gentlemen, our troubles are over, this is Tony 'The Torch' Barbella"

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'In retrospect naming the business after me probably wasn't a good idea,'

'In hindsight, we should have spent more on marketing than entertainment.'

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

'Would you like to see my sales presentation from where you're sitting? Or would you feel more comfortable in a head lock?'

'So anyways, I got a great deal on a candle factory from this total sucker and,,, hey, watcha reading'

"Hey, way to go! You invented both the disease AND the cure!"

"Liked your proposal, but like everything, it's on the back burner."

'One thing about a recession - it separates the men from the boys.'

"As an expert in loyalty, Fido will create an emotional bond with each customer."

'I just don't understand why I'm not getting any business...'

Actualities - Betting Mania - Man attempting 75 shaves in an hour has selected 75 shareholders of the docks 'because they're easily shaved'

"I'd like to avoid a costly and embarrassing trial but I could use the media exposure."

"Sometimes it sucks to be the Captain."

'We will no longer make major decisions based upon our playing 'one potato; two potato'...'

The Cowards Way Out.

'Surround our project with lots of useless extras so our critics have something to pick at while we ram our proposals through.'

"He's a psychopath, I like that in a man!"

"But Herman, we can't just throw in the towel like that."

"Dad's having problems at his business. He's been with lawyers, CPAs and financial consultants all day."

"Well, it could be the rising tide of consumer indifference to our company's latest product, or it might be the sink in the men's bathroom acting up again. We're still not sure."

An older white male executive is barely hanging onto his career

"We're still figuring out how to monetise him."

Toy Store/Battery Store

"Why does your men's clothing store need a loan?" "During the pandemic sales of pants have dropped way off."

"Wow, this is history in the making! HOw soon can we get a scooter salesman down there?"

"I think you need to reboot your carrot."

"I ran it up the flagpole and no one knew how to salute."

'Understand Briggs, it is not enough to fail - others must succeed.'

"The investor liked our business plan - particularly the in-depth assessment of our competition, which is who they've decided to invest with."

"I got funded based on the domain name. Any ideas what my startup should do?"