Business Outings Gifts

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

The World's Easiest Airport

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

"I love these off-site business meetings."

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'Remember, Henson; we're not here to hobnob - we're here to schmooze.'

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

'I feel like my ears are about to pop.'

Technological Dependence.

"Expense account or regular?"

School trip little porters.

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

'Hanson - committee of four.'

Airport

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

A Day in the Country.

"We've come so far together...wouldn't it be great if they had frequent achiever miles?"

Watching the football.

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

'He must be going economy!'

Airport Bored Rooms

'When you said I would go places with the firm , sir, I was rather hoping for more than the annual outings...'

Gates A-B Taking Care of Business, C-D Funny Business, E-F Do Your Business.

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

'Business or pleasure?'

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

Airport Security. Remove Shoes. What do they call the guy in charge of all this airport security? "The TSAR"!

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

Business-Class.

"Hell: The Airport"

John couldn't help but think that his team had a different perspective on the event than he did...