Business Gatherings Gifts

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

"I'm Only here for the beer!"

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"We're experienced an extraordinary amount of growth this year."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Bo're'droom

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

Lethal Presentation

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

The devil you know and his plus one

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

The prying mantis,

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'All right! Who put my dozing-off during our last meeting on youtube?'

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'