Business Loss Pillows

Man watches sales chart drop through the floor.

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

Very Difficult Conversations

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

Danger Slow Sand.

"My career's in shreds, but on the bright side, so are my files."

'Don't worry about your job at the office, Sweetie. They declared bankrupty today.'

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

Between Offices

'Don't bother cleaning out your desk. We'll be hiring you back as a consultant for half the salary and no benefits.'

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"Wait, you're firing me?! But I was Time magazine’s Person of the Year!"

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

Sales chart plummets into employees head.

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

I.O.U. one pot of gold.

'I'm not worried about losing my job. I'm worried about keeping it.'

'Our company has hit an iceberg and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

"We're all in the same boat, except it's more like a life raft than an actual boat."

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"How have you managed to keep your job?"

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

"I used to think" if I don't go to work the world will fall apart. . . but it fell apart anyway."

'The golden eggs are great... but I need you to lay a golden parachute.'

St. Elmo's fired.

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

Paper Profits Break Glass In Case of Emergency.

"First the good news - one of us hasn't been made redundant."

"You're fired, Withron. I got a terrific deal on a handful of ballpoints."