Business Executives Gifts

'For the last time, it's called a 'win-win' contract. Nobody gets whacked.'

Build Your Own Portfolio

'What I'm challenging this group to do, then, is to redirect our shared passion for the idea of making money into actually making money!'

I am billing, therefore I am.

'I'm just concerned that if we embrace change this one time, change might get the wrong idea and mistake it for some kind of long-term commitment!'

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

'Speaking for myself and every other right-thinking person...'

'I'm really sorry, but production costs are far lower in Korea!'

'Next time keep the Justice Department and the SEC in mind when you're thinking outside the box.'

'We're projecting growth in the third year, but unfortunately, we'll be out of business by then.'

'Our only hope is a merger so we can become too big to fail.'

'Generally, cost-cutting is a good thing. Specifically, too much of a good thing.'

"The first goal of our ad hoc committee should be to learn Latin."

Calendar; 'Point of no return.'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"I would happily pay more in taxes, if somebody made me."

Shareholder's Meetings

'Psst! Can I run your ethics committee?'

'Remember, it's not a lie if it makes us money.'

'Rumours over the company being insolvent are exaggerated.'

"Good God! Has the dollar fallen that far?"

'What split would you settle for, fifty fifty?' - 'As long as I get the hyphen as well.'

Who blames who in health Insurance problems

'What I lack in cognitive flexibility, I make up for in moral flexibility.'

'That's it? That's your backup plan?'

"All those in favour say 'aye'."

'Are 3-D, high definition webinars really necessary?'

' That's our founder. After spending twenty years in the himalayas, he finally discovered that the true meaning of life was to make money.'

'There are some ethical roadblocks, so do we use our Greedy Positioning System or our moral compass to find a detour?'

'It's an exciting new synthesis of the classical sales approach and the miracle of direct mail.'

"Everywhere you look, there's a rate hike."

'Another setback - the mediators just went out on strike.'

'It kind of brings a tear to your eye -- a whole new generation of little consumers.'

"I'm Only here for the beer!"

"Remember the good old days when it was a suggestion box?"