Bushfire Awareness Enthusiast Gifts

"How many volunteers did we get to piss on the PM if he caught fire?"

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

Harsh Mellows.

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

'The Torch Holder'.

Roasting the Moneybox

This "fire" invention is taking more wood than we expected. The First Cost Overrun.

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

'Your father's a genius kids. First he discovered fire and now marshmallows.'

'Rubbing sticks together was a great idea. After 40 minutes, I'm so warm I don't need a fire!'

The Cause of the Australian Bushfires

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

They discover fire and we spend all day cooking!

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

Flash Cuisine

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."

"He must be a pro. He's got his own stick."

Shepherds washed their socks by night.

Creepy Camp Stories.

Nobody likes a smore loser

"and when they woke up, the kids discovered that the house had just one 19", black & white TV that only got... 3 channels."

'Is the fire included?'

Smokey Bear crying because of deliberately started forest fires

Bonfire

"Okay, boys...time for bed!"

Bath Bonfire

'For the life of me I can't see how cooking over a fire, bathing under a spigot and sleeping on the ground can be fun!'