Burglar Baffler Gifts

The Dog whisperer.

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

"I have an obligation to the stockholders, not the employees!"

"The boogie woogie bugle cat of Company B"

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

Snowman Driver

'Forget it lads. We've been refused planning permission for this one!'

'A-1 security from crime ... but can't stand the isolation.'

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'

"Little Timmy is big enough to use you burglary tools."

Federal Center for the Study of your Tax Return.

'Bugler! Sound the charge!' 'Can you hum the first few bars, please?'

"Don't worry. We've never hit a target since we've been in office."

It's not that I cheat or read faces: I'm good at poker because I can smell fear...

Early Ram Raids

"And you sign here..here...and here.."

"Wow! Nice job on that display, Baldo! Just don't tell the boss. He'll make you do more."

"In time you will come to see that Football is ballet with taco chips."

"Was it you dad's idea to play 'taps' at our wedding?"

'Anything I can break has to go.'

"Genesis" "*The King Gus Version"

"If you must be a Francophile, could you lose the flag and just play the Marseillaise?"

Waste Thinner

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

"I've been racking my brain for hours and I still can't get today's Sudoku."

The guy at the store said to sink it once in awhile

You've reached the Internal Revenue Service. For training purposes, this call may be recorded by Satan.

"I'm not sure I'm familiar with that bugle call, Sergeant. It sounds kinda panicky."

'Our bugler is sick with the flu.'

"You failed to enclose with your rebate form the correct tail feather from an extinct bird species so we are unable to process your request..."

'Well then, which is it? Hands up, read the note or hand over the money? I've never been good at multitasking.'

'It's a matter of opinion, to me it's a smash 'n' grab, to you it's a window of opportunity...'

Vinny 'The Mole' was a firm believer in Take Your Daughter To Work Day.

'Dogs are from Mars, cats are from Venus.'

"At your age I was out liberating things."