Bureaucracy Bashers Gifts

'There were some cost overruns on the project that we need to discuss.'

How many workers does it take to put up a Christmas decoration?

London GPs income slashed by 'list cleaning'.

'We still need a copy of your husbands death certificate.'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

UK/US Free Trade Deal

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

Quality Control

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Time for More Paperwork

Washington D.C., Acronym Capital of the World

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

Moses holds up new federal regulation guidelines.

'Yes, sir, what can I do for you?'

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

"Of course it's a stupid sign, but you wouldn't believe how much money it brings in for city hall!"

"‘Click’, you have reached the White House, press 1 for shameless groveling, 2 for presidential pardons, and please have your credit card details ready..."

"We should have taken the cubicles."

"They found a use for that old paper shredder."

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

The Buck Never Stops.

"I'll be honest... there are books by James Joyce that are easier to follow than these bad boys."

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

We're transferring you to company headquarters so you can kiss company hindquarters.

"Do you have an appointment?"

"These are just the guidelines, the forms are in the truck outside!"