Bug Jokester Pillows

'Well Sir, it tastes like O-positive to me...'

The good news is that there are no flies in my soup. The bad news is that I have fly paper stuck to my head.

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

What's that? - 'It's a mosquito bite.' - 'Scratch it!' - 'No, I need to buy some cream.' - 'Make it bleed!!!' - 'Gahhh!!!' -

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'You've got restless wag syndrome.'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

Human Sex Chromosomes: Female/Male/Male Who Leaves Fly Open.

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"I think you should hire me for my vast software knowledge. . . and then pay for me to go learn software."

"Someone has hacked into our Computer."

That isn't what prove you're not a robot means, Bob.

"Remember that ultimately we must answer to Chairs."

'The problem seems to be in the memory bank.'

At the Brew-haha Comedy Club

How is your soup, sir? Speaking for myself, it looks pretty good. I can't speak for the fly, of course.

"Remember, the password is case sensitive."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

"Well, there goes your theory of him thinking of you as his pack leader."

"Come on, dear...you can't blame everything on Russian hackers."

'If you cut back on children, at least try to eat them before they nibble on your house.'

Our grocery carts are genetically modified.

The Screeeen!

"You drop yours first."

Printout in a genetics laboratory forming dna double helix

"Bingo, that's what I thought: It's a blood-sausage!"

"I hope I age as well as you, Dad. Except for the neck."

'When I said you will get an office with windows, I was referring to the operating system on the computer.'

'Well, if you DNA made you do it, I'm sentencing your DNA to thirty years in prison.'

"That must be Java Man!"

Cloud computing.

'I don't like the look of this fish.' 'It had ugly parents.'

This is my Dad --- One of the people I evolved from.