Budgetary Worrier Pillows

"Give it to me straight, doc. Will I outlive social security and medicare?"

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

'I said we've got to lift up our numbers! I did not say to turn a loss of 150.000,- into a loss of 280.000,-!!'

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

'The operation we want you to do is to remove 25 from our budgets.'

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"Yes dear. But, I don't think you're actually supposed to dispose of your disposable income."

"Oh, great. The bunny runs away and lives high on the hog on my tax dollars. Next!"

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

The Circle.

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

"All I did was ask it if we'll ever collect Social Security and Medicare."

Energy Bills

'Remember, Henderson - A penny saved is a departmental oversight.'

"We’ve been told to cut the drugs budget so in future Louella here will be chanting away your pain."

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

The End of Economic Stimulus is Near!

"I don't know what we'll do when our adjustable-rate mortgage resets."

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

'It's money in the bank. . . so it's worrisome.'

'Well, we've been talking about downsizing, and it looks like the bank is going to make sure we do.'

"I feel that just as as I think I can make ends meet, someone moves the ends!"

Generation Rend. Young man rending his garments in anguish at extortionate rents.

Credit Crunch.